Nine Men Who Changed My Life

One of our staff pastors here at Cornerstone just lost a close friend and mentor to old age. During a meeting this morning, that same pastor mentioned some of the testimonies shared at the funeral of his friend and how much this man had impacted him during his life. This prompted me to consider the many godly influences I've had, some of whom I've probably never thanked. So here goes. I submit the following blog entry with the hope that it might encourage you to 1) tell someone how they’ve shaped your life in a positive way and 2) make a more concerted effort to build into someone’s life.

Here are the Top Nine Men who have influenced my life for good. If you’re not on this list, please don’t feel slighted. If you’re under forty you’re ineligible (for now); but give it some time…

09. Dr. David Robey, my academic advisor
It’s not that Dr. Robey and I were terribly close. I never even called him by his first name (he wouldn’t allow it). He was one of those guys who worked long and hard to earn his PhD and he expected you to recognize it. But he was remarkably persuasive. When he chastised me in class for using the word ‘orientate’(which he would remind me was not an actual word), I was not offended, but enamored by his love for the English language. And his precision. So when he praised me publicly and often for my communication skills, I believed it. I’m sure he was just being kind, but if Dr. Robey was selling, I was buying. Despite being labeled as arrogant by some, this man was the right person to give this twenty-year-old just the confidence he needed.

08. F. Lionel Young III, my fellow expositor
It’s hard to believe that in a 96-hour Masters program, there would be virtually no mention of the value of expositional preaching. (And this is not a knock on GRTS; this is an indictment against most seminaries.) But when I met Lionel, during an internship at Calvary Church, he helped me catch the vision for teaching the Scriptures verse-by-verse. Expository preaching, he would say (in the vein of John MacArthur, Alistair Begg and John Piper) prevents us from making the Bible say what we want it to say; instead we let God speak. And we listen. Over three-quarters of a decade, Lionel’s influence extended well beyong the preaching arena. Through his friendship and investment in me, I went from being a seminary graduate to being a pastor.

07. Leonard Miller, my “youth director”
Never have I seen grace personified like it was with Pastor Lenny. He exuded godliness. His pores couldn't keep it in. When his daughter was brutally raped and murdered, Lenny (miraculously) extended a hand of forgiveness to the perpetrator. And prayed for his salvation. He treated everyone with dignity and respect. Whether they deserved it or not. Because he saw them as image bearers of the living God. Even at the age of sixty-something, he still served as our church’s “youth director.” He couldn't chug a gallon of milk or burp the alphabet, but he was extraordinary. He made everyone feel loved and accepted. There’s a reason that the funeral home was bursting at the seams when Lenny died a few years ago. He did for many the same thing he did for me: modeled for us the love and compassion of the Lord Jesus.

06. Jonathan Edwards, my theological inspiration
Sometimes dead people wield the greatest influence. Widely regarded as the most brilliant theologian ever to come from America, Jonathan Edwards has shaped my thinking in a profound way. And it’s not just his theology that inspires me, but also his life. To think that Edwards was fired by an overwhelming vote after preaching for decades with faithfulness and fervor reminds me that opposition awaits even the most sincere and passionate followers of Christ. But his writings reveal that his devotion to God and his love for the things of God were virtually unmatched. As a participant in the Great Awakening, Edwards saw more people come to Christ through his preaching than most could ever dream of. But he never took any credit. All praise and glory he gladly gave to the Lord Almighty.

05. Walt Shirley, my spiritual father
A former boxer who nearly KO’d the first person to tell him about God’s sovereign grace, this tough-guy-turned-soft-hearted-Calvinist would influence me more than he would ever realize. I still remember going to test drive an old Lincoln Towne Car with Walt perched in the back seat, just waiting for the salesman to conjure up some hair-brained scheme to trick this nineteen-year-old into signing on the dotted line. He was ready. Just like he was ready to take me to my first father-son picnic or provide spiritual insight at the drop of a hat. He lived life like he played golf: all or nothing. He didn’t care if you liked it or not; he was going to tell you about Jesus, and what the Lord had done in his life. He took the saltshaker out from under the bed and turned it upside down on the world. And I’m better for it.

04. Bill Kreitzer, my childhood best friend’s dad
Who knew that a battle-worn and bomb-skirting Vietnam veteran could be so caring? He may have been rough around the edges, but Bill showered me with kindness and attention. We played basketball in the driveway. He let me crash his family gatherings. Even after I spent three or four consecutive days with my best friend Scott (his oldest son), Bill never got tired of this teenage wannabe rebel. Or at least never let on if he did. Bill wasn't flashy, but steady. Had I been broken down at the side of the road somewhere, which happened frequently in my old ’77 Ford Grenada, or thrown in jail, Bill would have dropped everything to pick me up. His joyful, yet disciplined spirit was just what I needed.

03. Nile Fisher, my first pastor
He was accused of being aloof, dry and even unapproachable. And my experience only confirmed those claims. But he was a man who deeply loved God and God’s people. His fondest and most unyielding affection, though, was reserved for Jesus Christ. So he preached Christ with conviction, humility and passion. Verse by verse, section by section. To this day, I don’t know how he did it. My preaching prep takes me at least twenty hours per exposition. Pastor Fisher preached three times a week for thirty-five years! He didn’t counsel people; he didn’t feel qualified. But he ministered to hundreds deeply and sincerely as he explained to them the life-altering Word of God.

02. Denny Hyten, my father-in-law
At 6’7” he is the least intimidating person I know. Not because he’s weak or cowardly, but because his height belies his unparalleled kindness. In more than one of the ten-plus moves that Jenine and I have made in our fifteen year marriage, Denny has been the only one around to help me unload the truck. He’s just been there. Every time. And he’s not only been there, but he has modeled faithfulness in every are of life: to his wife, his church, and most importantly his God. What’s the old saying, you don’t marry a person, you marry a family? Well, little did I know that by virtue of my marriage to my wife, I would gain one of the most cherished friends and beautiful examples I’ve ever had. I praise God for Denny Hyten.

01. Bob Farren, my stepdad
His was a most unenviable job. To marry into a family with two smart-aleck, fast-talking and know-it-all kids would not be on the to-do list of any right-minded person. But Bob did it. And he never acted like he regretted it. Working 14-hour days to make sure the bills were paid, Bob made every possible sacrifice to keep our family afloat. He didn’t know it, but my sister and I were watching. Intently. We noticed how he never missed a day of work. We couldn't help but see that he never did anything half-heartedly. We saw him out of the corner of our eye at every sporting event. (He even surprised me by showing up at my college intramural championship game; he was the only parent there.) To this day, it pains me when parents don’t support the activities of their children, because Bob set the bar incredibly high. But he did more than just cheer us on in our athletic endeavors. He made me believe that anything I set out to do, I could accomplish. Bob's influence will be felt generations from now in the sons that I raise and the children they're blessed with.